I have to keep reminding myself that my tortoise doesn’t go in a straight line. She keeps taking roundabouts and side trips. I thought it was the hare that did that. It would be wonderful if I could expect my healing to keep plodding one baby step at a time toward sanity and health. Unfortunately life doesn’t work that way. One day I’m swinging from a star and the next I’m swimming the Styx upstream and I don’t know how to swim.
I learned a long time ago in Al-Anon that it’s best to look at progress from a long view rather than comparing today to yesterday. That way I can say that I’m lots better than I was six months or a year ago. But I may not be better than I was last week or even last month. There will always be setbacks and I must remember to keep the faith that there is a “light at the end of the tunnel” even if I can’t see it right now.
Today I have felt sad. I feel like a lonely soul rather than a free spirit. I know this will pass. I have to wait it out and work through it. I had lunch with friends today. Tomorrow I have a very busy day–a hair cut, a visit with my sister, a lunch date with a friend and a facial tomorrow evening. Pampering is good. Busy is good.
A good quote for me today: “You make a life out of what you have, not what you’re missing.”—The Forgotten Garden by Kate Morton
Back On My Own 
I hope you feel better tomorrow.
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This is where I am these days. Some days are spectacular again. Other days are dark and without my little candle of hope, there would be no light. Right now, I’m sort of in between the two extremes. I am sad – actually, melancholy is the word. Just gray. Everything in my world is gray. Thank you for writing about this and giving me a place to step into your community.
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You mask your sadness well. Lunch was wonderful and I would have never guessed you were sad. That translates to mean that sometimes you may have to tell friends it’s not a very good day. Love you.
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Thanks, Tish. Actually I felt better while I was at lunch with my two buddies.
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i have had some sad days lately too. 😦 i try to enjoy fall and all. but all i can see in the viewfinder is the nasty ass winter that isn’t far away. for some reason fall always reminds me of the yuck stuff. not sure why.
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Suzy, Julia used to tell us that we need to plan something that we can look forward to. Get me details. We’ll start working on LV. Just think–a flight and a hotel. Fun!!!
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