Fun at the grocery store.

Humor is something that thrives between man’s aspirations and his limitations.  There is more logic in humor than in anything else.  Because, you see, humor is truth. ~ Victor Borge

Yesterday was to be a routine trip to my local grocery store.  Thursday is Thanksgiving Day, of course, and I’m responsible for pecan pie and green beans with shallots.  Except for the haricot verts, everything can be purchased well ahead of time.  So off I went with my many-times-used canvas bags.  In short order, I found everything I needed and several items I didn’t really need and proceeded to the checkout line.  I had more than the fifteen items allowed for express checkout but the kind young man assured me it didn’t matter.

Ever the helpful one, I started to bag my groceries as the cashier scanned them.  I don’t know why but I couldn’t seem to hold on to the shallots.  I had quite a few of them and they didn’t seem to want to travel home in my bag.  Or my tired hands weren’t well-coordinated or something, but whatever it was, the shallots went slipping out of my hands and back on the checkout counter.  I finally said, “Well, crap, I’m losing all my shallots.”  Now, I have no idea why that was so funny, but it was–to the teen-aged cashier and to me.  He started to snigger and I started to giggle and no matter what either of us said after that, we just giggled louder.  At first I could see that he was trying not to laugh.  He was probably afraid of offending me.  I said, through my hiccups and tearing eyes, “I’m sure I’ve lost more important things than shallots.” (I was thinking things like money, eyesight, my husband; you know, important things.)  I have no idea what he was thinking but it certainly tickled him because he could hardly finish scanning my groceries.

The levity continued.  I bought a carton of eggs.  As is my habit, I had opened the package to check for breakage but I apparently didn’t close it carefully.  My cashier-child scanned the carton and started to place it in my cart.  As he did so, the carton opened and a dozen eggs went flying.  I told him it was probably my fault, that I had opened the carton to be sure there wasn’t a broken one in there.  He gave me an impish grin and told me, “Well, now they’re all broken.”  After retrieving more eggs, I bade him good-bye.  “You have a nice Thanksgiving, Ma’am,” he chortled as he cheerfully tackled the egg-slimed floor.

During the days, weeks, months of my divorce, I never completely lost my sense of humor.  Granted, there were times when I didn’t find much to laugh about but those times never lasted long.  Most days I can find humor all around me.  I laugh at myself often.  I remember those last months before D physically moved away, I would be rolling with laughter at something silly on TV and he would sit there stone-faced.  Sometimes I would ask him, “Don’t you think that’s funny?”  His response, “Yeah, I guess.”  My dearly beloved ex-husband, I wish you laughter–lots of it.


13 thoughts on “Fun at the grocery store.

  1. Hi Doc. Thank you for visiting my blog. And for taking the time to comment. Isn’t it wonderful to laugh again with all your heart and soul. I’m happy you have someone to share it with. I still have to find someone on the street (or in the supermarket) to share my glee. It’s interesting, though, how many people, total strangers, agree to “go there” with me. Goes to show–we all need a good laugh. Have a good week. Laugh a little. Laugh a lot. 🙂


  2. Humor IS the best medicine. Sometimes the best revenge, too. I’ve been glancing through your blog and loved this post. I would have been the guy standing behind you, hopefully laughing along. It’s been a long road since my divorce trying to find the laughter. But since I have, it seems I can’t stop. Thankfully, the new woman in my life understands me all too well. I think she’s the reason I’m so happy lately. Well, at least she’s part of the reason. Anyway, seems I’ve gone off at a tangent. I enjoyed your post and will be back to read more. Have a good run-up to Christmas and hope to read lots more.


  3. Thanks, Amy. It’s been a very good day. Hope yours has been, too.

    On humor–I’m with you. I see it all around me, every day. I started to say I’d be a lunatic without it but then I realized I’m a lunatic with it and that’s what’s so much fun. I’m not sure I’m making sense. I’m very tired–but happy. 🙂


  4. Hi Ducks. You make me chuckle, even with your comments. I can only imagine your reaction to twelve little Humpty Dumptys falling off the wall and splatting one by one in rapid succession. 🙂


  5. Oh, Pat. I have tears rolling down my face as I imagine this scene. Perhaps it could kick off a play. Made me think of what I did a month ago. I stopped by a Food Lion on the way back from the big town of Burgaw to pick mostly cleaning supplies. Got to the line with the largest bottle of lavender sented fabric softener I could have found and it slipped right out of my hands, top popped off, and lavender colored softener spread across the floor. What could I do? Nothing but apologize as the manager started bagging, another employee asked if I wanted another one and started to retreive it for me, and a clean up person materialized from thin air. The cashier finished my sales and without blinking an eye smiled at me, assured me not to be concerned, and opened the cash register next to him. People around were smiling and many said the front had never smelled so good. I was totally impressed with the staff. Could it be that we just don’t hold on to things like we used to anymore? Think about it. Sometimes that can be a good thing.


    • Hi Tish! Did you know they have some kind of powdered substance they sprinkled on the eggs and the cashier told me it would absorb every bit of the egg. Who knew? I bet that would work on fabric softener. And it would make the garbage smell good for a time. 🙂

      Happy Thanksgiving!


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