“Baby you don’t thrill me but you put off body heat.”
I was on my way to my favorite market yesterday when I heard this line on A PRAIRIE HOME COMPANION. I laughed so hard I thought I would have to pull over. There was a group singing familiar tunes with new, funny lyrics. I would love to give credit but I can’t as I don’t know the singers or the writer of the lyrics.
I spent Martin Luther King weekend with a group of girlfriends. We’ve known each other for 30 years or more. I explained to them how my PJs have changed since D left. When I was sleeping with him I was always in something sleeveless or short-sleeved. Now I wear long sleeves, long pants–really cozy warm clothing. The reason being, in addition to what you’re thinking, that he was like great big heating pad. I could feel his warmth without even touching him.
I think I’ve started to realize that it is the comfort of him that I miss most. Yes, I loved him. Yes, I still love him but perhaps in a different way. When I talked with him recently my heart didn’t race. I didn’t feel all gaga over him. But when we went our separate ways that day my angst over not having him as my companion and confidante was great. I don’t know if that ever goes away. Thank God for warm pajamas and good friends.
Back On My Own 
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After so many years together I believe there is an invisible connection between two people. It may only be a history, memories or just a nostalgia for a love and life once shared.
I don’t know if the connection is ever truly lost, or if the gaping hole ever mends completely….but I’m hoping that time does heal even if there’s still a scar left!
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I know just how you feel. I too wonder if that feeling of loss – that rather gaping hole – ever does go. My thoughts are with you. And I hope you don’t mind but I’ve added a permanent link from my blog to yours!
Hugs. Caroline
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